Hi!

Hello, wow is this a borefest or what? I left this place for, like, a year! Okay, so a lot of things happened to me recently, I almost finished my 1st year of university, I got a new phone, and new cats as well :) By the way, I was looking at my Twitter archive and found one of my tweets, which is this one:

It literally translates to "I want my hair until hip level, I wonder how long I have to wait for it.". Well, I'm here to tell you, I have to wait for 2 years to reach that level. My hair is on hip level now :)

Sigur Rós Live.

Hello people, I've disregarded this place for months and here I am crawling back to my old lair. Reading all these posts from few months ago made me realize that I was in a very tense self-destructive state of mind that somehow I think it was the most depressing phase I've ever been in my life. 


Nowadays I've put a lot of efforts on turning over a new leaf; what I did was I've tried to treat people nicely, smile in public more often, talk to people without making awkward smile, get rid of nervousness when talking to people on the phone. Yes talking about that, I've been so into an iOS-based game called SingSomething. It's a game where you record an excerpt of your singing and let people guess what song you are singing. Since I've played the game I realized that I just helped myself to get rid of the nervousness I had when talking to people on the phone. The more I play the game the more I care less about how I sound like thus it helped me to overcome the awkwardness I have when talking to people over the mic. To test whether I really get the hang of it or not, I've conducted a simple test on myself by talking to random people online and yes, it worked. Only 80% though, I really need to work on that remaining 20%. I know some people would think that I only talk shit and stuff but really, this game helped me a lot. I wanna say thank you to the game developers so I've sent my thank in an indirect way by contributing a new music genre for the game which is consisted of 100 songs. The game developers are so nice they even rewarded me 100,000 coins for the game though I don't think it's that necessary.


 By the way, I've swapped room with my sister and now I have a bigger room than the one I owned previously, but this room will be shared with my 2 other sisters so what difference does it make? I've dubbed the pink walls with grey because I am not a fan of powder pink, it doesn't match the color of my personality I think. But it's only halfway through though, so half of the room is grey and the other half is powder pink so it looked hideous right now. Mom promised me to buy a new bucket of grey paint next week so I'm gonna work on those walls again, soon. By the way, this is how one of the walls look like (and this is really my favourite wall of all):

We also have a new family member whom we all love because she really knows her way with humans so I guess everybody is so comfortable with her, but she loves to bite people. We call her a lot of names like "Kukang (because her eyes are like coucang's eyes)", sometimes "Kecil (because she's still a kitty)" and "Ketot". I think Ketot suits her because she's fluffy, chubby, short and small so Ketot kinda sums it all, I guess. This is her:

And last but not least, this is what happening in my life:

Yup, I robbed my sister and I just bought my ticket to Sigur Rós in Singapore this November. Life is happy once more.

You Vs The World

Hi, it's me again.

I just finished preparing my documents to be sent to UMS tomorrow. It's a UPU matter, I hope I'll get a course there I really can't wait to further my study! Most of my Poli's friends are undergoing their degree right now, and I am 8 months late.

But there's one thing that concerns me the most, if I really do get the chance to study this September, will I ever get friends? I mean, my social skills are EXTREMELY LOW. No, not kidding. I don't like talking to people unless they talk to me first, and I also don't like to pretend that I like to befriends with people that I don't like to be friends with. That's one factor. Another factor is, my self-confidence is near to nil. That is probably because I focus too much on my physical appearance and I'm not comfortable with it. I am quite fat, and I don't think people love being around fat peoples like me. My face is not friendly at all too, that's probably one of the reason that repels people away from me. It's hard being a social chameleon, it's hard getting along with people that doesn't have the same way of thinking as you.

I would like to share some real-life stories that I've been through before. Back in '06 when I was transferred to a new school located in the heart of my city which is SM Lok Yuk Likas, I never thought I would get any friends there. But it's surprisingly easy to get along with most of the peoples there, because one thing I realized is most of them are open-minded, just like me. We have a lot of topics to be talked about and we laughed a hell lot! I really enjoy my times at my old highschool, I didn't regret any seconds I've wasted there. I even stayed in contact with most of my close friends from that school. And then 3 years later I furthered my diploma at Politeknik Kuching Sarawak. Trust me for a person like me, you wouldn't enjoy the surrounding and atmosphere. They are completely the opposite of my old highschool, and the peoples there are just... I don't know how to say this, lame probably? I've tried to get along with them and it's very excruciating and hard. I can't do that. I only have a few "friends" there, only about 8 or 9. Pathetic isn't it. I don't have anything to talk about to most of the peoples there, we don't have much in common. It's a pretty hard life living in that place for 3 years. I just wish I won't be in a place similar to that in the future.

What I am trying to do now is to improve my social skills, I even hate talking to people I don't know on the phone but I am trying to change it now. I just wish the best for myself.

The Way I Fell In

Sometimes you just get to one point where you just leave everything the way it is, not trying to make it better or worse and I think I just arrived at that state right now. I don't know what I want, I don't know where my life is leading me and I don't know where do I lead my life, I don't know what I want in my life. I'm not sure if I just have to go on and find another job or I'll just further my study. Nothing makes me happy again, everything is ruined and everything makes me tired. Everything makes me feel sick. I can't decide what's the best for me, I don't know what I want. I can't just rely on other people to think of what's the best for me. I'm in the shittiest state of myself nowadays I don't even wanna go out and meet people. I think everything in my life is going down, my self-confidence everything is falling apart. I just... I just don't know how to start over. It seems like everyone else in my life is getting better from day to day and I'm just here standing still. Even peoples from my past have moved on. I have no talents, I can't do anything right, everything about me is so lame. I just... I really just wanna let this all out because I don't have anyone specific to talk about all this shit. This is what I've been feeling these few days.

I am so tired of everything.

The Top

I think I should make this list sooner or later so here it is! My Top 4 before-the-90s Albums (I think this could be my top 4 albums of my life too)

1. Joy Division - Unknown Pleasures (1979)

This album is just so perfect. The content of this album is so dark and gloomy, the songs are full of dark emotions and I can feel it go straight to my heart. I honestly say that I can't really handle some of Joy Division's songs especially the ones in the album "Closer" because they're just too good to be true. By far, this is probably the most powerful music album that ever been made in the music industry. Furthermore, the album art is quite impressive too. (psst, I have a t-shirt with the imprints of the album art on it!)


2. The Cure - Disintegration (1989)

Yes yes, this is one of the finest album ever made by my favourite band of all time The Cure. Most Cure surveys I found on the net voted for Disintegration as the best Cure album. In fact, a track from Disintegration which shares the same title with the album made me fell in love with The Cure. The first moment I listen to the song I just, I feel like my heart and my soul and mind and body exploded and dissolved together with the music! Lol I really can't explain it properly with words, it sounds so weird. This is definitely a must-have album for all music lovers out there, don't miss this out!


3. Pink Floyd - Dark Side Of The Moon (1973)

I don't think I should explain much about this album, everybody KNOWS how awesome it is. This album, I can safely say, it is a cheaper and safer alternative for weeds. You don't need weeds to get high, you only need Dark Side Of The Moon! No seriously, no bluffs. When I first listen to Breathe I feel so weightless and my mind feels so relaxed. Give it a listen if you want to experience it yourself (here's a hint: start with Speak To Me/Breathe)


4. Santana - Santana (1969)

Who could ever forgot this masterpiece over here? Performed by six hippie boys back in the days and it's just so perfect for me when I'm in my "hippies" mode. Yea really, sometimes I just feel like hanging out in my room with bandanna on my head listening to this album. I still remember the first time I saw their live video performing Soul Sacrifice at Woodstock and it just blew me away! I read somewhere that during the music festival Carlos Santana is too high that he thought his guitar was a snake so he have to hold it tight or the "snake" will harm him. But nevertheless, that song is the one song that ever made me feel sorry for myself that I'm not a part of the 60's. What a shame! And the artwork is awesome too, I've printed one and put it in my bedroom as a poster.

First Week of 2012

Wow I can't believe 2011 is finally over. That year brings so much happiness to me compared to the year before. 2011 is the year I've done with my diploma (with flying colours!), the year I discovered my enthusiasm for The Cure's music instead of listening to their music the whole years just like any other music I would, the year I got job and made my own money for the first time, and also the year that I'm completely free from any "commitments" (you know what I'm talking about). So long story short, 2011 is a good year for me. 

Now we've entered 2012 and all we can do is to reminisce the good past and improve ourselves. As for me, I have a good start with this year. When I was browsing my old songs stacked in my hard drive, I came across this one band whose songs used to sooth me when I'm filled with negative feelings. This one band which I (used to) don't even recognize the faces behind those mystic, ethereal music. This one band called Sigur Rós.

 

Believe me or not I just saw their faces all together for the first time a few days ago though I've been listening to them for the past few years. So here's a little intro about the band: Sigur Rós is a post-rock Icelandic band consisted of Jónsi Birgisson, Georg Goggi Hólm, Kjarri Sveinsson and Orri Páll Dýrason. They are known for their out-of-this-world music and the soothing, beautiful falsetto voice of the vocalist, Jónsi. I don't mind if my opinion counts or not but I think this band is creative and unique and all their music is just... no words can be formed perfectly to describe how beautiful their music is. Eventhough I don't understand most of their songs because it is either sang in Icelandic or gibberish (which the media labelled as Hopelandic) but they never fail to amaze me. I'm just so happy that I have the chance to start my new year by getting back into Sigur Rós and I also spent the whole first week of 2012 listening back to old Sigur Rós' songs and catching up with their new songs that I have missed.

I guess this is the most appropriate time for me to say that I just have the Ágætis byrjun of my new life.

Procrastination!

Hello fellas! All this while I've been keeping a folder of things I want to publish here in my blog and I just remembered to do so today. Haha what a procrastinator! Well this is basically a collection of photos I wanna share during my trip to KL a few weeks ago and some other random things and as usual, let the pictures do the talking starting from... NOW:

Probably the main reason I wanna go to KL. We don't have Domino's here in Sabah! :(

Just look at this yummy goodness. Dear lord how can anyone resist this?

Went to Al-Andalus. Look at that typo haha.

I don't really like how it taste like. BTW it's not an alcoholic beverage so keep your negative thoughts about me to yourself lol :P

And of course ini tidak boleh miss punya haha.

And loook what I found at Alamanda. THE CURE! I honestly thought that it would be impossible to find Cure stuffs here in Malaysia but I was dead wrong! :)

I found the place where Kurt Cobain resides. Nahh just kidding!

We also went to Bubbagump Shrimp Co. at The Curve. The foods are pricey I tell you! And look at what I've ordered that day, when I first saw it I was like "wtf man they use newspaper?" but then I examined the paper and it's not a newspaper at all, it's an oil-proof paper (or whatever you call it).

Just thought of snapping this picture because it reminds me of The Cure! You see, The Walk is one of The Cure songs and if you subtract v from The Curve and it would be The Cure The Walk written on the board! This would probably sound lame to non-Curefans haha I'm so sorry :)

Talking about The Cure, I just received my 7" The Cure vinyl the other day. Too bad I don't have a vinyl player I can't play the record but nvm, I just bought it for collection purpose. Furthermore the price is quite acceptable too. And it's an old-ass record just look at the artwork cover, and it smells old too but I like it a lot.

Random doodles on my hand. Close enough?

Okay lah I think that's about it. I'll keep on updating this blog from time to time, see ya!

Boredom strikes.

I'm still at work and oh God I'm so boredd! There's no one here but me and now I'm blasting my music to the fullest and of course there's a sing-along to it ;) So I've ransacked my phone pictures folder and I kinda found some things that I could share with you guys, though it's not necessary but what the hell right? 

Lately I have a new hobby which is online shopping. At first I don't put my trust on things like this but I can't help it, all the things I want are only available on the net (I blame eBay for this!). Online shopping is so convenient, you can get things you want that you never found in places near you and the price is much much much cheaper too! For instance, look at the picture below:

I got all of these sweet babies from the internet believe it or not! :) Okay you see the guitar picks over there, there's 10 of it, right? Guess how much did I pay for it? RM10? RM9? RM7? RM5? No no no! I only got all of them for RM1++, jimat kan? And then that laser pointer over there I only got it for RM1++ too and then that purple case for my BlackBerry I only got it for RM3. 

 (erhemm, ignore my face) I even got this red shirt from the internet ;)

Here's another pictures that I wanna show you guys, I'll just shove it all here and put captions to it and we're done okay?

Last 2 days me and my sisters went to Servay Likas and I spotted this near the biscuits section. What the hell is the purpose of this? Inside joke probably? Kinda creepy lol, "saya tahu" means "I know" in Malay :)

That's my cat Nando chilling near a busker dog whom we called Jiro (I feel like we own him now). Look at Nando, she just chill there as if Jiro won't have the guts to bite her. My mom said Nando have this evil look that no other animals dare to hurt her, I can't disagree to that xD

Here's our other cats. They love to hang around our neighbour's house they eventually became comfortable there and the consequence is...

...we have to cage them up every night because they've been leaving their "remnants" all over our neighbour's flower pots, nanti ada lagi "surat layang" kena kasi oleh jiran macam 3-4 tahun lalu. Semua pun kucing punya pasal la ni, nasib nda begaduh bha.

Well I guess that's it, I'm going home about 1 hour from now. Bye bey!

Weedy Burton :)

Hey. I'm at work now but there's not much to do so I'll blog today :) I'm really excited right now because next week me and my sister are going to KL again (booyah!) aaaand we're going to help my little sister who's taking her SPM exam right now to pack some of her things and bring it home with us. I have to save up some money if I want to enjoy myself to the fullest but apparently I've spent my money like crazy on foods especially. THAT has to be stopped. And what happened to my diet plan that I was blabbing about months ago, you ask? Well, faded away. I'm so sorry for myself that I never accomplish any diet plans that I've planned for myself since '03. 

Urmm... and last Tuesday I felt so happy yet disappointed too because I got the chance to call an (online) friend of mine, Filipe who went to The Cure's Reflections at Royal Albert Hall London and hear them playing for myself! I asked for help at cureconnections (it's a forum for The Cure fans) and he's the kindest one to offer to help me. When I called him I heard the audience, it's very loud it's almost sound unclear to me. It's very exciting, you know, it's like I can feel the audience's "excitement" aura or whatever you may call it. Unfortunately I only get to call him for about a minute and a half because of reasons. I don't know, probably DiGi's roaming line eff'd up during that time because Filipe tried to call me too but he can't reach me. When I called him I get to hear to The Weedy Burton. The basslines are so clear and it conduces my jolliness I just wish I was there at the moment! 

This is The Weedy Burton. It's a catchy song, give it a listen!

What Happened To Me Recently Part 2

I dyed my hair and this is the result:

And listening to Of Montreal songs makes me happy again.

BYE!